POLYGAMY:AIM TO PLEASE YOUR OTHER WIFE!

Junior to Senior wife: do small things to please your Senior wife. Ask her advice constantly and compliments her on her positive qualities

A GOOD SENIOR WIFE:
consults her Junior wife on all important matters relating to the household.

divides the house work equally and or fairly

highlights and encourages positive attributes of the Junior wife

makes the Junior Wife feel special and “spoils”her a bit!

A GOOD JUNIOR WIFE:

consults her Senior Wife on all important household matters

respects her Senior Wife even if not senior in age

goes out of her way to do special things for her

ask advice of Senior wife often

Advertisements

13 thoughts on “POLYGAMY:AIM TO PLEASE YOUR OTHER WIFE!

  1. Can you help me? I am looking for a little bit more answers. I practice Ifa with my husband and our two boys. So I can see that their can be very positive things that can come from a polygamous relationship. Escpeacially, betwwen people who plan to work together to achieve spiritual goals such as: trying to have understanding, compassion, and genuine love for everyone; understanding on a deeper level that the true values in life are building good character and good karma, because after all those are the only things that can be taken with us to the next life.

    Anyways, can you email me some information on what you feel like is the most spiritual way for a husband to go about wooing another wife with out their being any feeling of put your self out their to someone who might have the wrong idea? Like, I personally don’t subscribe to the whole swinger thing, (because relationships based on sex to me are just too “worldly”, and not very usefull when looking at the bigger picture), Its seems like all of the sisters we try to talk to end up not really feeling/understanding the hopefully spirtual part of what a polygamous relationship can be, but instead the seem to just be intrested in being someones side mistress for sexually and monetary benifits with no responsibility to what a family can be. How can we find the ones that get it? I mean my husband has women hitting on him all the time, but the seem to always be the wrong kind when we consult Ifa, or use our own intuition. My husband lived a celibate life for almost two years before we got together, (and not because women weren’t banging down his door)……I guess its hard enough finding one good wife, but how do you find another,…let alone that can understand Orisha, and is Black! Ha! go figure…well you actually might know so please help me and write me back. P.S. sorry for the four page letter here…I’m just a very passianate Sango woman.

  2. Sister Princess, You are a wonderful BLACK woman to be so considerate of the husband’s natural needs. Like anything else the best way to find your partner for SISTERS or BROTHERS is to pray(and in Orisha,sacrifice )for your GOD chosen partner to be revealed! You along with your wonderful BLACK man pray and sacrifice about it and Orisha and Olodumare will bring your future co-wife right to him-no searching,hitting on necessary!

  3. I am confused……… An ifa man is told in divination that he will have multiple wives so he can have more children. His current and only wife now, cannot have more children. Then he starts to seek multiple wives. the ones he chooses, some can have children, most can not. I am one of those he chose that can not.

    SO my question/concern is that he is just taking advantage of a reading to have multiple wives, cause I personally cannot fulfill his destiny. But there is a pure love in our relationship.

    I am extremely skeptical of polygamy, but am seriously considering it because of how I feel for him.

    He doesn’t have a job, but explains how each of us would have a purpose.

    Shouldn’t the man have a purpose too?

    Is there an Ifa law on polygamy that requires the man to be able to support us all.

    If not, it seems more like a valid way to “cheat” on his current wife and to just be able to have multiple women in his life.

    I know I’ve asked for alot here but I can see a few advantages, but I see so many, like jealousy (never thought about sharing my man b4) and diseases (what if one of us is unfaithful) and actually deciding what our roles are.

    Any suggestions, I would appreciate it.

    Odabo

    • Sister pray about this. Ask God to show you if this is your husband. . Then if God says it is then go for it! Since all men are attracted to other women you are simply going for a fair honest deal were you can work together with the other wives to improve the whole family, condition. But pray for your husband because an african man -Ifa and all takes care of his family. God will show him how he can do that and your prayers will get that result!

  4. Hi Im having a real problem with polygamy an polyamorous men. N i can help but feel that it is an excuse for men to mess around. From what I have read and heard so far from those that know is that the man should be asking the first wife permission. An why would a sex addict in the Ifa tradition try to convince women who only deal with monogamy only to deal with such a thing. Why does a young man only choose women as friends on a social website if they are only networking? and also why would he only be searching for women with certain physical features and ogle them all day long. This young man is very selfish plays games and lies, hides what he is doing and plays games. He behavior is quite shady and it seems to be that he is not really looking for a wife but servants and sexual pleasure. He disagrees but his actions a are obvious. What do you say about this. I dont believe in polygamy and do feel that it is a valid way to cheat; play women for fools and play on the love that they have for them. Why does a man play on the reading he has had from Ifa. An what about diseases.

    • Chula, FIRST OF ALL SISTER YOU MUST PRAY FOR YOUR HUSBAND. INSTEAD OF CRITICIZING HIM AND HIS ACTIONS PRAY TO SEE HIM AS GOD MADE HIM-FREE OF LUSTS AND WRONG MOTIVES. PRAY DAILY. TREAT HIM ALWAYS WITH AFRICAN RESPECT AND LEAVE THE LINES OF COMMUNICATIONS ALWAYS OPEN. POSITIVE POLYGAMY CAN WORK IF BOTH OF YOU WORK ON RESPECT AND HONOURING EACH OTHER. AND THAT NATURALLY STARTS WITH THE WOMAN, FOR SHE SETS THE EXAMPLE OF THIS AND THE MAN PICKS UP ON IT.AS FOR DISEASES REJECT THAT.REMEMBER THAT ALL WOMEN HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT CAUSE MOST MEN HAVE OUTSIDE WOMEN.

    • Sister I agree that this man you are talking about sounds like he is sex possesed. But any sincere Black man who is reponsible and caring to all the women in his life is the one who can do Polygamy well. Why Polygamy? Because men are attracted to many women by nature. To put fairness in the game we women must share fairly and understand man’s nature!

  5. You are kidding me right? This sounds like lose your own self respect and let your husband treat you like shit!All men do not cheat some respect and honor ther wives and show them love.How can a man truely say he loves you and he has sex with other female’s, that is not love that is taking advantage of another human being because they are so desperate to keep a man that they would allow themselves to be disrespected.No respect can come from my husband sharing his bed with another women.Sex is combinding of 2 people into one it draws you closer as man and wife.Why would you allow someone else to come between that.This is just an excuse for a man to treat you badly only thinking of his desires-You are having a problem with it because it is wrong!Mankind changes rules to suit there desires and it never works out this is pure bullshit in every since of the word think more of yourself and dont stup to this level.If your husband wants someone else they have a word for it adultry,your word should be DIVORCE !

    • After reading these comments I decided its only fair that add my two cents. I am the second wife. I did not enter in to this lifestyle less then complete. I have a great career, amazing kid and amazing

      • *sorry* I am so happy. Yes, so not so great days but the big picture is Family. My Sr. Wife and I are sisters. We hang out together, we work together for greater good of our family. Some of these comments implied that the husband is getting all the benefits. I often feel bad for him, with all the wives running both homes. I will this life isn’t for everyone. For ME I would not have it any other way. We both have a special connection to OUR husband, its respected, and the same for him.

        Yeye odofemi
        Ase

      • Sister- you have got it BLACK right! BlackPolygamy benefits and protects the Black woman the most!

      • Yeye o! You are wonderful! Your attitude is what we all must strive to have-with prayer and God we all will gain it!

    • Sister-one basic fact of life you don’t know- All men are polygamous by nature because they are easily aroused were they control itwhen they react to other women. So as we see throughout the Bible this is a system that takes this to heart. It makes the man responsible for the women in his life.just as you can love all your children fairly the man can do so with the women he is closest to.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s